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How to Deal with Difficult People

5/2/2018

47 Comments

 

In our daily life several times we come across the people we don’t like to interact with, we don’t want to deal with or discuss the stuffs. But what if they are your family members or close relatives???

When it comes to family, though how difficult it is to deal with them you are clearly left with no choice. It could be your in-laws, close relatives or family friends. So just go ahead and take a challenge. If so, you'll want to know how to interact with them and not drive yourself crazy in the normal daily basis discussions. Deal with your difficult relatives by staying calm and being assertive. Then, follow strategies to make interactions with them more pleasant. Also, it can help to distance yourself from them when it's necessary to save your sanity.

Listen to Listen- If it’s your family member or relative then you know the person well. Whatever he is saying just listen to it although you have nothing to with it.  I know some times it’s really annoying. So do one thing don’t give even a single thought about it if it’s really bla....bla and bla...Just listen to listen. That person can’t enter into your head or mind to check if you are seriously listening to him. This is one of the best principles to maintain your relation and even you are not giving damn about anybodies murmuring. Just save your energy for good work.

Listen Calmly- Listening is the most important step in dealing with "unreasonable" people. It may happen that it’s really necessary to hear the front person when he is talking about your or families well being. Everyone wants to feel heard. No progress can take place until the other person feels acknowledged. While you're listening, really focus on what the other person is saying, not what you want to say next.
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Don’t Judge- We never knows what the other person is going through. Chances are, if a person is acting unreasonable, they are likely feeling some sort of anxiety, insecurity, vulnerability or fear.

Stay calm-When a situation is emotionally charged, you may get annoyed. Just stay conscious and present at the same moment and try deep breathing.
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Show Respect- Show respect and dignity toward the other person. No matter how a person is treating you, showing contempt will not help to resolve the situation. It may get worse.
Look for the unfolded intention- No one can go crazy or behave like a dog without any intention or reason. Sometimes the front person may not be able to tell you his intention behind all the drama. So just look out for the possible hidden need. What is this person really trying to prove?

Try to talk about it with your other family members you are good with. Who knows you may get the permanent solution for this problem.

Avoid Smiling- As this may look like you are mocking the person.  Sometimes it can lighten the mood, but more often than not, it’s risky and it may backfire.

Don’t act defensively- This is really tough. You’re naturally not enjoying the other person saying nasty things or things that you know aren’t true. You’re going to want to defend yourself. But the other person is grown so emotional; it’s not going to help. Remember, this is not about you. Don’t take it personally.

Raising your voice, pointing your finger, or speaking disrespectfully to the other person will add fuel to an already heated situation. Use a low, calm, even monotone voice. Don't try to talk over the person. Wait until the person takes a breath and then speak. Don't argue or try to convince the other person of anything.
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 After the situation is over, talk to someone about what happened. Discharge your own feelings and stress. Give yourself credit for getting through an uncomfortable situation. It takes a lot of energy not to act like a jerk when someone else is behaving nasty. 

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Being Stuck In The Past

5/1/2018

5 Comments

 

Why we get stuck in the past and can't move forward?

If we think consciously and try to analyse the fact, maximum people spent their most of the time while worrying about their past. It’s very natural to feel painful or being sad for some time though anything goes slightly wrong. It’s human tendency to react to the specific situations and dilemmas in life. The sentimental and emotional characteristic differs from person to person. But how correct is it to spend our maximum time just murmuring about the past?
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After a breakup whether it’s committed relationship or just a friendship there is a natural period of grief, sadness and mourning. It is a time when you feel stuck, when it seems to be impossible to live a life, and doing even the simplest thing feel like climbing Mt. Everest. The process can be different for each individual, but in my opinion, this period of mourning is fair game and well. It’s a human tendency; you do what you need to do in order to get through the pain and survive through the grief.
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At some point in life almost everyone face this phase at some extent. For anyone who has felt stuck before, you know exactly the feeling I’m talking about. It’s like you’re trapped under this huge weight of emotions and every step you take, that weight becomes heavier and heavier. Your mind gets clouded. Your heart grows confused with mixed fears, some uncertain anxieties and insecurity. In the entire storm finding your way seems close to impossible. Time ticks away and nothing seems to change. You may wonder why you feel this way and can’t seem to move forward and leave the past behind.

The past is already gone. Right now you don’t have any control over it. You can’t rewind a time or events that happened. You can’t go back and correct anything. So it’s better to let it go. Accept the truth. I know it needs more courage but yes it’s a bitter reality. ​

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